I’d settle for moderately clean

Me:  You have ten minutes to clean your room before I come in there with a garbage bag.

Peanut:  No.  I’m not doing it.

Me:  That’s fine.  You don’t have to pick anything up.  I’ll take care of it with my garbage bag.

Peanut:  Mo-o-om!  I can’t.  It’s too much.

Me:  It’s not too much.  Start with the blankets.  Then pick up the dirty clothes.  Then put away the stuffed animals.  That’s it.

Peanut:  Give me more time.

Me:  15 minutes.

Peanut, 5 minutes later, closing bedroom door:  I’m done.

Me, skeptical:  Your room is all clean?

Peanut:  Yes.

Me:  You picked up all of your blankets?

Peanut:  Yes.

Me:  What about your dirty clothes?

Peanut:  STOP PUSHING ME, MOM!  I’m not perfect.

Posted under Dialogue, It is a miracle I don't drink more often, My kids are assholes, Peanut by Laugh, Mom