Why yes, I did just tell the world how much I weigh
Care to join me?
P-Eu Strikes again
I have this “friend.” She is European. That probably has nothing to do with anything, but people have tried to assure me that she’s not really rude, she’s just “European” and somehow therefore has different standards for what makes one an asshole. I’ve written about my friend, the Pushy-European (P-Eu) before. We have an almost [...]
Guess who ended up with pancakes…
Henny: Mommy, I hab pancakes?Me: No sweetie. I’m making waffles.Henny: Okay. I hab pancakes.Me: I’m not making pancakes. I’m making waffles.Henny: No waffles. You make a pancakes.Me: No pancakes. Waffles.Henny: Okay. Yes. You make pancakes.
He’s got the fever
Moon: My throat was scratchy all day and now my stomach hurts. Me, touching forehead: Well, you don’t have a fever, so that’s good. Henny: I hab a Biebah. Me: You have a…Bieber? Henny: Yes. I hab a Biebah. Me: You have a Bieber Fever? Henny: Yes. I hab Biebah Febah.
Valid point
Me: You need to get your fanny in here right now and do the cleaning up I asked you to do.Peanut: I don’t even know what I’m supposed to clean up.Me: All this food the dog got into.Peanut: Um, it’s kind of your fault this happened in the first place.Me: I’m not the one who [...]
Oh, sorry
Laying in bed at night with Henny:Henny: Da-ee has penis?Me, shaking head yes.Henny: Peanut has penis?Me, shaking head yes.Henny: Moon has penis?Me, shaking head yes.Henny: Mahwee has tail?Me, shaking head yes.Henny: Mommy has penis?Me, shaking head no.Henny: Mommy has boob?Me, shaking head yes.Henny: Da-ee has penis?Me, shaking head yes.Henny: Mahwee has tail?Me, shaking head yes.Henny: [...]
Really? Dad and I just call that "Tuesday"
Moon: Can I have a sleepover this weekend?Me: No. But you can have one in two weeks.Moon: Ok. Because I haven’t had a sleepover since summer.Me: That’s not true.Moon: Well, I’ve had K over twice, but I mean, I haven’t had a GOOD sleepover. Where I go to someone else’s house.Me: So, you’re saying it’s [...]
And once again
Peanut: Mom, do you want this little comb that came with your new mustache scissors?Me: Nose-hair scissors.Peanut: Whatever. Do you want this little mustache comb?Me: No.Peanut: You’re not going to use it?Me: No.Peanut: Can I have it?Me: Yes.Peanut: Cool. I’m going to grow a mustache. I mean, not yet, but when I do grow one [...]
Yeah, I know
Peanut: Mom! Why did you buy these mustache trimming scissors?Me: To trim my nose hair.Peanut: Oh, I thought you were going to trim your mustache.Me: No. I need to trim my nose hair.Peanut: So, you’re not going to grow your mustache out?Me: No. I’m not.Peanut: You have a mustache, you know.
I didn’t feenk so
Henny (aka Toddler ): I see San-a!Me: Ooh, I see Santa, too. Hi Santa!Henny: Hi San-a! San-a gon bing Henny a pesent.Me: Santa is going to bring Henny a present because Henny is such a good boy.Henny: Ess. Henny good boy.Me: Is Santa going to bring Moon a present?Henny: Ess.Me: Is Santa going to bring [...]
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